Your cat is probably judging you.
I grew up in a house where cats pretty much ran the entire operation. My childhood memories are filled with whiskers brushing my face, tails flicking casserole dishes off the counter, and mysterious thumps in the middle of the night that my mom always insisted were the cats and not ghosts. I honestly did not even realize some households do not have cats. To me, cats were like furniture. They were always just there, existing, judging, shedding, and choosing which humans deserved their attention.
My auntie had a cat named Smudgie who became one of the most important figures of my childhood. Smudgie was this fluffy gray cloud with a crooked tail and an attitude that bordered on spiritual superiority. He used to do this strange thing whenever someone sneezed. Most cats run and hide. Smudgie ran toward the sneeze like it was a personal challenge. Every time someone sneezed, he would sprint across the room and flick his tail against their leg with this expression like, I heard that. Watch yourself. If you were sitting, like a flash Smudgie would be on your lap, nose to your nose, staring into your eyes, sort of challenging you to sneeze again. Now that I think of it, I don’t recall Smudgie ever sneezing, maybe he was just curious about the whole thing and trying to get close to the source.
It made no sense. But honestly, the longer I live with cats, the more I realize that almost none of their behavior makes sense to humans. Yet somehow cats think everything we do is the strange part.
Growing up surrounded by cats gave me this confidence that I understood them. I thought I had cracked the code. Then I started reading scientific research about feline behavior. Suddenly I realized I had understood almost nothing. Cats are far more complex than I ever imagined, and they judge us not because they are rude but because, biologically speaking, we are constantly violating every unspoken cat rule ever created.
Science is finally giving us the explanations for why our beloved little tyrants look at us like we just failed the most basic test of common sense. And the more I read, the more hilarious it becomes.
So here is my expanded, deeply affectionate, scientifically supported list of things that explain why your cat thinks you are doing everything wrong.
I learned a lot writing this, and I hope it makes you laugh and maybe understand your cat a little better.
Top 10 Cat Behavior Facts That Explain Everything
1. Cats see humans as large, awkward cats, not as a separate species.
Anthrozoologist John Bradshaw, in his book Cat Sense, explains that cats do not modify their social behavior much when interacting with humans. This means they treat us the way they treat other cats. They bat at us, head bump us, slow blink at us, and judge us because, from their perspective, we are just defective cats who never learned proper feline etiquette.
2. Cats interpret prolonged eye contact as a threat.
In the wild, a direct stare is a challenge. A study published in Scientific Reports showed that slow blinking increases bonding because cats see it as non threatening communication. So when you stare lovingly into your cat’s eyes, they may think you are threatening to fight. The slow blink, however, is their version of a warm hug.
3. Cats meow mostly for humans, not each other.
Adult cats rarely meow at other cats. They rely on body language and scent. Research published in the Journal of Veterinary Science confirms that meowing is a communication tool aimed primarily at humans. Cats basically developed a language specifically to boss us around.
4. A cat turning its back on you can be a sign of trust.
Predators protect their vulnerable sides. When your cat sits with its back to you, it is not ignoring you. It is saying, I trust you not to stab me. This is very high praise in the cat world.
5. Belly rubs trigger instinctive self protection.
The belly area contains vital organs, and a study by the American Association of Feline Practitioners notes that defensive reactions are often triggered by sudden touch in vulnerable areas. Even the sweetest cats may react without meaning to.
6. Cats bring gifts because they think you cannot hunt.
Research suggests cats treat humans like kittens who need help learning survival skills. So when your cat drops a dead moth on your pillow, it is not being gross. It is being your mentor.
7. Cats prefer running water because stagnant water can signal contamination.
Feline behavior studies through the Cornell Feline Health Center explain that many cats instinctively prefer moving water because it indicates freshness. This is why they drink from faucets and ignore that expensive water bowl you bought.
8. Purring is not always a sign of happiness.
According to research from the National Library of Medicine, cats may also purr during stress or pain as a form of self soothing. The frequency range of their purring may even promote tissue healing. Cats basically come with built in medical equipment.
9. Face rubbing is mostly about scent marking.
Cats have scent glands on their cheeks, and rubbing places their scent on you. It can be affectionate, but the primary function is territorial. You belong to them. They are not yours. Accept your place.
10. Cats hold grudges longer than people think.
Research shows cats have long term memory and can distinguish between helpful and unhelpful humans. This is why your cat remembers you accidentally stepping on its tail in 2019.
When you put all these facts together, you start to understand why cats act the way they do. They are operating from thousands of years of instinct. We are the odd creatures in the house who keep breaking the rules and then wondering why we are being judged.
To me, cats are a perfect blend of independence, comedy, and mystery. They are small, fluffy contradictions. Smudgie, my childhood cat hero, taught me that animal personalities can be more interesting than human ones. He taught me patience, observation, and that sometimes the funniest love comes from a creature who will flick you with his tail after every sneeze.
The more I learn about cats, the more I love them. They are not being dramatic. They are being cats. And honestly, the world would be a lot more boring without their judgment.
Thank you for reading my article, as a reward, here’s a cute kitten purring: www.youtube.com/watch?v=CDzG2RaZORo
● Scientific American
Why Does My Cat Do That
https://www.scientificamerican.com
● Jonathan Losos, cat lover and evolutionary biologist
Cat Science Book List: https://amzn.to/44AIvgL
https://www.hmnh.harvard.edu/event/cat%E2%80%99s-meow-how-cats-evolved-savanna-your-sofa
● 5 Cats who owned famous scientists
https://www.discovermagazine.com/5-cats-who-owned-famous-scientists-44028
● National Library of Medicine
Cat Communication and Healing Frequencies:
Cat larynges produce neural frequencies
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/37794583/
Enigmatic production of low-frequency purrs in cats
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/38052174/
● Cornell Feline Health Center
Feline Behavior Insights
https://www.vet.cornell.edu/departments-centers-and-institutes/cornell-feline-health-center
● American Association of Feline Practitioners
https://catfriendly.com/keep-your-cat-healthy/know-cat-pain/
https://catfriendly.com/keep-your-cat-healthy/what-is-normal/
● Educational Videos for Veterinary Teams
https://catvets.com/education/educational-videos/
● John Bradshaw’s new book; “Cat Sense”
How the New Feline Science Can Make You a Better Friend to Your Pet
https://amzn.to/4aedyCD
Here’s a heartwarming story of a mechanic from Des Moines who saves a cat. https://www.clearpointnews.com/a-mechanic-a-kitten-and-a-rescue-to-remember/